Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
