shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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