everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize
