Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
