For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize