i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Pants 0. Shit 1.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
Randomize
