I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Green mimosas i think yes
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
