I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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