I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
