Bisexual people are plain selfish.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
