I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize
