Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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