its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
