I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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