i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
you were so high you spent the rest of the night smelling pepper to prove you can sneeze with your eyes open
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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