Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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