This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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