put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Randomize
