YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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