What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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