at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
