The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize
