Jerry, you need to find god
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
Randomize
