What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
Randomize
