U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
They are going to name an STD after you.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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