she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
