i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
don't judge my taste in strippers
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
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