With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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