I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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