Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
There are leaves in my underwear?
Randomize