So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize