don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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