Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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