bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize
