a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Randomize
