walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
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