I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
