So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
