Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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