Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
