We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
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