Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
