You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize