Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
