All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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