Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
