Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
You brought string cheese to the strip club
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
