Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I thought I needed to get laid. Turns out I just needed pasta.
Randomize
