I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Randomize
