I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
