Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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